Alex Gordon

RECAP: Another misspent evening of Royals baseball

Why I spend so many of my summer nights this way is a true mystery. I’m a (semi) young man with a wife and a child and two dogs and a semi-interesting neighborhood I could go explore with my burgeoning family and instead I choose to spend my time watching [gestures] whatever THIS is that the Royals insist on doing.

And it’s not that I don’t love being attached to the couch for three-plus hours at a time while Ryan Goins does Ryan Goins Things (grounds out weakly on a 3-1 count, swings-and-misses on pedestrian-speed belt-high fastballs, etc.); sometimes it’s a good reminder on the preciousness and fragility of life and that your choices are important. Like choosing to pinch-hit for Ryan Goins close and late or something.

Anyway, the Royals lost 3-2 to Texas. They’ve won twice in the month of June. They’ve scored as many runs since Saturday as Cleveland and Oakland scored tonight. Feel free to find your own fun little nuggets of truth. At my last little stop, one of the Very Important Editor Gentlemen told me to be less negative in my recaps, that people don’t like to hear about the bad parts when reading about they’re favorite teams.

Fortunately, I’m not 100 percent positive David and Craig do anything more than Control+F my writings to get most of the swear words cleaned up. So I can be as honest about this as I care to be; feel free to read elsewhere if you need these turds more polished than I care to make them.

Easy as it goes, the Rangers had a run three batters into the contest. Shin-Soo Choo (that man again) singled on the second pitch of the game, stole second and moved to third on an Elvis Andrus ground out. Nomar Mazara’s sac fly to center scored Choo easily. The game was tied for all of three batters.

Jakob Junis loaded the bases for poops and grins in the second, giving up singles to Jurickson Profar and Rougned Odor before walking Joey Gallo. But Junis cleaned up the mess as easily as he made it, inducing an Isiah Kiner-Falefa ground ball to Adalberto Mondesi, easily turning a double play, although Profar did come across.

The only two capable Kansas City hitters teamed up to halve the deficit in the bottom of the second. Alex Gordon lined a one-out single, scoring on Hunter Dozier’s double. Dozier decided to try for a triple, which might’ve been fine had Carlos Tocci fallen down, or accidentally thrown the ball over the fence or something but instead he made the strong thrown to Elvis Andrus, who threw Dozier out by 15 feet at third. Goins was the next batter, so it’s more likely than not that the one-out situation with a runner at second wouldn’t have come to fruition anyway.

It might’ve been better if Profar hadn’t robbed Salvador Perez’s leadoff rip in the hole between short and third, but squandered chances and so forth.

Odor homered in the sixth. Mike Moustakas homered in the ninth. They canceled one another out, although Odor’s bomb did get Junis halfway to the franchise record for homers allowed in a single season, which is fun!

One of the funniest moments of the season happened when Alcides Escobar—who only plays everyday thanks to the Royals obsession with his silly-ass streak—took a borderline strike three call and had the audacity to turn and say something to plate umpire Chad Fairchild.

Was it the right call? Probably not.

Does Alcides Escobar, of the .202 average on the season, have a leg to stand on when it comes to anything that happens at home plate? Also probably not.

The ninth inning had something resembling actual promise for the Royals after Moustakas’ leadoff homer. Perez singled, but Gordon struck out and Dozier’s force out pegged Perez at second. With Goins batting and two down, Dozier was caught on a delayed steal by Kiner-Falefa.

Kiner-Falefa is not a catcher. In fact, it was his first career big-league game as a catcher.

The Bright Spot: Three shutout bullpen innings are really good! I don’t personally believe that required four pitchers, but you could fill several books with things I believe that are wrong.

The Nadir: One-through-four in the order combined to go 2-for-15, with both hits coming in the ninth. Won’t win many games with what should, ostensibly, be your four best hitters batting .133.

The Next Step: A blessed day off (I’m gonna watch the NBA Draft because THAT is what actual hope looks like, not Ryan Goins) awaits on Thursday, while the defending World Champions look to reprise last weekend’s sweep in Kansas City when the Royals visit Houston. Danny Duffy and Dallas Keuchel square off in the opener.

Related Articles